I am being pressed against the wall.
I freeze with the terror
Of my nightmare coming true.
Within my head the alarms
Of danger are deafening
A shrill shriek of stop,
push away before it's too late.
But the fear screams louder,
don't do anything. They will hear you,
they will find out what's going on,
And if you breath a word
you will be a liar in their eyes.

Somehow I ended up on the floor
And I just laid there unable to move.
No words would come,
no feeling either
Whatever he wanted I let him do.
Then pain, I felt pain,
but could not scream,
For the fear was greater than the pain
The fear of waking everyone up.

Here I am alive,
but not really
I am empty,
too scared to move.
Scared of every possibility
of them finding out,
But yet I want them
to know how I hurt,
And how very empty I feel.
I find relief,
a razor blade
I bleed out the pain
a beautiful color of red

And on my arms
I feel it drip away.
But pain and blood
to cover up more pain
makes no sense,
So then I keep it all inside me
and lock it in a chamber inside my heart,
In hopes it won't keep growing,
rising and expanding.
In hopes it will stay there
and not explode,
For that will be the day
I will surely die.
Nikki's Poetry: